Pathwork is not about eradicating the ego but about developing a healthy ego that is connected and integrated with the Higher Self. One day as I was driving on 1-70 in the mountains of Colorado I entered that state of "driving trance" and asked myself, "What are the characteristics of a healthy ego?". These are the responses that my own Higher Self gave to me. It occured to me that these are,in fact, the goals of successful psychotherapy.
1. To develop a true sense of self-acceptance that is not based on external factors but on an internal acceptance of one's own being.
2. To develop healthy boundaries and limits.
3. To be able to be authentic and speak one's truth rather than present a "false self" or mask.
4. To let go of shame about the past, one's mistakes, history and shortcomings. To practice self-forgiveness and compassion.
5. To be able to feel and express the full range of human emotions appropriately.
6. To practice healthy self-care physically, emotionally and spiritually.
7. To take responsibility for one's life, choices and behaviors rather than blame others.
8. To be able to create and maintain healthy relationships that are interdependent rather than overly dependent or anti-dependent.
9. To separate physically, emotionally and financially from one's family of origin and to individuate with a sense of one's own true identity.
10. To develop a spiritual/philosophical understanding of life which becomes our context for experiencing life's challenges. To see our lives as an unfolding journey that facilitates the evolution of our soul.